Thursday, May 15, 2008
I'm stress. Super stress. Super duper stress. FREAKING STRESS !Yesterday was the last the last TR. My duty was quite boring at first. Kept complaining boring boring boring. Was playing with Aisyar, Joey and Jingheng. We were so bored that we switch off the lights and smile. Seeing if we could see each others teeth. I know it's kinda dumb and stupid but we were bored at that time. Stupidity just popped, so can't be blamed. After times of boredom, customers starts coming into the restaurant, we got busier. After closing the restaurant, cleared up everything and got ready to leave. I was super tired after TR. Arms aching and gastric hurts. After that went off to meet Jason. Pass him the application form for Sunglasses Hub. Had dinner. Couldn't really eat cause my gastric hurts alot. Super duper pain. After that took bus 9 home. When i got home, every single one is asleep. So guess i've got home late. As in for weekdays. But daddy and mummy got used to it. As recently i keep going home late during weekends. I know that they will get worried whenever i'm out late at night. Sometime i feel so guilty for making they worry. Guess i'll try to be more good girl. No often late nights outing, try to cool down whenever i'm stress and talk to them more often. Guess thats all i could do to be a good girl ? Oh yes ! No smoking ! I'll try my best to stop !
Today i barely sleep during lessons or maybe i could say i DIDN'T SLEEP AT ALL ! The feeling of not sleeping but being sleepy was horrible but the thought of it, i actually do study and learned something. It was wonderfull. Hopefully i won't sleep tomorrow during lessons and test. As i'm buring the midnight oil today because i'm studying for my front office test tomorrow. I know last minute don't really help but i guess i'm able to make it ? Study now and read through tomorrow morning. Sounds nice right ? Hopefully i'm able to do the test tomorrow. My gastric was back this morning. Didn't eat at all. Smoked during break only. I think only 4 sticks. So yes, i'll try my best to stop. After school, went for lunch with Darren and Said at Katong. Had this super nice chicken rice. Was like craving for food once lesson ended. So suprised that i'm hungry that i felt like eating when i'm having gastric. Guess it's the first time ? I don't know. Right now, my mind if full of i don't know, don't wish to know, hates, stress and tired. Hopefully after the Havana Night Party, i'll feel better and no more stress. STRESS FREE PLEASE !
And YES, i doubt i'm going drinking tomorrow night. Cause i'm really really really feeling real tired. I need a rest. So guess i'll meet you guys up next week or next next saturday. ((:
*Friday - Grandmother's place for dinner. After that no idea yet. Maybe home sweet home.
*Saturday - Sentosa with Iris (jie) and Seow Wei ? Wondering if they're able to wake up early.
*Friday or Saturday - Submit application form for Jason. It's a MUST ! Urgent !
*Sunday - Family day in the morning and afternoon ? Not comfirm yet.
*Monday - Public holiday. No plans yet. ((:
Guess thats all about yesterday and today. Wish for a better tomorrow. Hopefully, no gastric, able to do the test, don't fall asleep during lessons, no smoking and be myself.
POSITIVE THINKING ! ((:
I hate it when things just keep crushing onto me. No one understands how i feel right now. I've been keeping lots of things to myself and now that it's feeling real heavy, all i can do it cry out. I hate putting fake smiles infront of others. I keep forcing myself to do this and that. Sometimes i really can't help and just breakdown. I'm really feeling so stress. Family stuffs, school stuffs and etc ! All just keep crushing onto me. No one could just freaking understand how i freaking feel right now. NO ONE ! NO ONE AT ALL ! I called Jason , wanted to let him know how stress am i . Trying not to sound like i'm crying when i'm actually am. But he wasn't free. Call jie, she didn't answer as i just remembered that she's working. SIGH ! ))':
11:43 pm